


Love me

by setsukayoichi



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Not so angst, Warning mention of suicidal attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-19 04:42:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11890254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/setsukayoichi/pseuds/setsukayoichi
Summary: I love you more than my voice and my voice isn't only my work, my life, my everything, is my way ofexpressing myself,  communicating my feelings for you.





	Love me

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys , Hi ladies  
> This is Setsuka who speaks  
> I came up with this one shot ( bc im too lazy to write all the story sorry) and i hope you like it... I wanted to write some real angst but It didn't came out as I wanted so ... Im sorry T_T  
> This is only my second work ?? Dunno (...)  
> English is not my mother tongue so please if you find mistakes let me know!  
> Leave many feedbacks to letting me know what you think please!

If something was needed in Bae Jinyoung's life, that something would be definitely Park Ji Hoon. If you are asking yourself why, you don't need to question yourself further. Ji Hoon was the light breaking through the window of the complete darkness Jinyoung felt.

 

"Ji Hoon is like that " that's what Jinyoung thought.  
"Always cheerful, always smiling, always trying harder than anyone else to become himself, to show himself to be who he wants. That's his best quality being himself, and it's the only thing that kept me going. In my whole life, I never imagined to be the one doing this talk but here I am!  
I met him the first time while we ere doing Produce 101, and that was our starting point. It was fun being in his group of friends, he is always the most loved one. The chosen one, the face, the visual, but Park Ji Hoon isn't only his visual, only his cute side, only 'Ne maum so ge jeojang!' . He is someone, someone I care. Someone that means something. If I have to explain his person with words I'm not sure If I will ever be able to finish and at the same time to find the right words so I will let this song say some of the things I always wanted to tell you."  
Song played: Waste my time by Saint Asonia.  
"Hold onto me  
Like we're the only ones that see  
The sky above us falling down  
And breathe in my ear  
Like we're the only ones that hear  
The mountains crashing down

I had wasted most of my life  
Playing games that I knew I'd lose  
Let me sing to you, just sit here don't move  
I just wanna waste some time with you

So take my hand  
I don't understand  
How they kept us apart for so long  
And smile so I can see  
That it's really you in front of me  
'Cause that's still just so hard to believe  
(...)  
Forcing back the tears  
Over all the years  
Boarding up the door  
And throwing my hope to the floor  
I could not forget  
Now it all makes sense  
That you're here with me  
And I never never want to leave

I would've wasted most of my life  
Never even knowing you  
Now you sing to me and I still don't believe  
That you wanna waste some time with me"  
After singing he put down the microphone and went to sit near to his lover giving him a wholehearted smile.  
"I love you and I'm not just saying it, because it's our wedding, because I want to show off, because you are the most beautiful human being in my eyes and heart but because I mean it."  
He was almost tearing up.  
" I know I'm being cheese as hell but I thought the most beautiful day in my life was when you accepted my proposal but I never thought our wedding would make me feel so complete, so lucky, so fulfilled. I love you Park Ji Hoon and I'm not scared of it. I'm not scared of being with you anymore Hyung, I'm ready to front our life together."

 

All this words in Jinyoung ears felt even more bitter on his tongue and even more harsh on his heart. He didn't understand what he was doing there. He was the last person on earth that wanted to assist that scene. Why was His Park Ji Hoon in Guanlin arms? Why is His Park Ji Hoon at his wedding but more important WHY IS HE MARRING LAI GUAN LIN?  
<< Something must be wrong here. Someone must be wrong here and that someone isn't me. I'm not the wrong one here.>>  
Jinyoung couldn't stop thinking he just couldn't understand why he was there. His lover with his best friend and he wasn't in the picture. He wasn't even in the frame. At all.

Jinyoung stood up and went to the new married couple to ask questions. Infinite questions. Unluckily he couldn't even get near them that Sungwoon stood in his way grabbing his arm.

"Jinyoung where are you going? Aren't you going to cheer with us?"

"Sorry Hyung, I need to talk with Ji Hoon hyung."

" It's his wedding, can't you stop being so selfish for once and start thinking more about others? Leave them alone enjoying their time!"

" Hyung, you... you don't understand, let me go I have to "

"Don't you dare screw their happiness like last time"  
Were the only words Sungwoon let out of his mouth like a whisper before leaving Jinyoung's arm with a deadly look in his face.

Jinyoung having finally his way to get through the gathering and get to the couple, he got near them, and watching the two of them in the eyes he asked:  
"What is happening here?"  
Ji Hoon quite surprised but not amused by his question answered:  
"We are having the time of our life. And you aren't included. Why are you even here?"  
Jinyoung shook his head not having even the time to think about something appropriate to say.  
"I'm here to take you back to planet earth. Why did you marry him? Am i nothing to you? We loved each other"

" Well , we loved, remember, loved, each other before you betrayed me with Lee Daehwi and even before you threw yourself on Guanlin almost killing him with a bottle. I'm not even sure why we are having this conversation on my wedding, so, please take a seat or go away It won't make any difference for us."  
"But-"  
"There's no but, go away."

 

<< That's it>>  
He thought. He was crying, alone, Ji Hoon left him. His only reason to smile and to be happy, he... He left him. Jinyoung climbed onto the bridge. Han river was the best, he found happiness gicing his hearth to Ji Hoon here and here he was going to end it.  
He threw himself in the river.  
He felt like falling  
He screamed.

"Hey, hey, hey darling what's wrong?"  
Ji Hoon caressed his hair while he was opening his eyes finding himself crying.  
"I thought, I thought, I dreamt you were leaving me and I was, I was so scared, Ji Hoon don't leave me"  
"My treasure, what a nightmare you had. I'm here I'm here with you and I can't leave you, I don't want to."  
Jinyoung tried drying his tears but they didn't want to stop falling.  
"Promise me, promise me It will be forever. I can't live without you."  
" I will never leave you, Bae Jin Young, I love you. I love you more than anything else and don't ever again say that you can't live without me. Love living like you love me"  
"It's the first time"  
"What?"  
"It's the first time you said you love me clearly and... twice"  
" Aaah shut up"  
Ji Hoon felt embarrassed and hugged Jinyoung placing his face in the other's neck.

It's not that they didn't know they loved each other, they showed it in many situations, they meant it in many different ways.  
It's just that they really loved each other.  
They cared for each other, they were there for each other, they improved each other.  
" I love you too, I love you more than my voice"  
These were the last words Jinyoung needed to say to Ji Hoon, like a whisper, like something heard only by the two of them, a silent scream before tightening the hug that connected them in that moment.

**Author's Note:**

> And then.. what do you think?  
> Help me with my ansiety and let me know it please! If you want to contact me ... Or you feel like to talk just write me on twitter! @SetsukaYoichi is my nick!  
> Thank you very much for wasting your time in this! I love you ♡


End file.
